Daniel Goleman first brought ‘emotional intelligence’ to a wide audience with his 1995 book of that name. He found that while qualities traditionally associated with success — intelligence, toughness, determination and vision — are required, they are insufficient. Truly effective people are also distinguished by a high degree of emotional intelligence, spanning five competencies:
Self-Awareness
The ability to recognise what you are feeling, to understand your habitual emotional responses to events and to recognise how your emotions affect your behaviour and performance.
Self-Regulation
The ability to stay focused and think clearly even when experiencing powerful emotions. Managing your own emotional state is essential for taking responsibility for your actions.
Motivation
The ability to use your deepest emotions to move and guide you towards your goals, enabling you to take the initiative and persevere in the face of obstacles and setbacks.
Empathy
The ability to sense, understand and respond to what other people are feeling. Self-awareness is essential to having empathy with others.
Social Skills
The ability to manage, influence and inspire emotions in others — an essential foundation for successful teamwork and leadership.
Rate each statement below from 1 (does not apply at all) to 5 (always applies to you).
1.I realise immediately when I lose my temper
2.I can 'reframe' bad situations quickly
3.I am always able to motivate myself to do difficult tasks
4.I am always able to see things from the other person's viewpoint
5.I am an excellent listener
6.I know when I am happy
7.I do not wear my 'heart on my sleeve'
8.I am usually able to prioritise important activities at work and get on with them
9.I am excellent at empathising with someone else's problem
10.I never interrupt other people's conversations
11.I usually recognise when I am stressed
12.Others can rarely tell what kind of mood I am in
13.I always meet deadlines
14.I can tell if someone is not happy with me
15.I am good at adapting and mixing with a variety of people
16.When I am being 'emotional' I am aware of this
17.I rarely 'fly off the handle' at other people
18.I never waste time
19.I can tell if a team of people are not getting along with each other
20.People are the most interesting thing in life for me
21.When I feel anxious, I usually can account for the reason(s)
22.Difficult people do not annoy me
23.I do not lie or avoid telling the truth
24.I can usually understand why people are being difficult towards me
25.I love to meet new people and get to know what makes them 'tick'
26.I always know when I'm being unreasonable
27.I can consciously alter my frame of mind or mood
28.I believe you should do the difficult things first
29.Other individuals are not 'difficult' just 'different'
30.I need a variety of work colleagues to make my job interesting
31.Awareness of my own emotions is very important to me at all times
32.I do not let stressful situations or people affect me once I have left work
33.Delayed gratification is a virtue that I hold to
34.I can understand if I am being unreasonable
35.I like to ask questions to find out what it is important to people
36.I can tell if someone has upset or annoyed me
37.I rarely worry about work or life in general
38.I believe in 'Action this Day'
39.I can understand why my actions sometimes offend others
40.I see working with difficult people as simply a challenge to win them over
41.I can let anger 'go' quickly so that it no longer affects me
42.I can suppress my emotions when I need to
43.I can always motivate myself even when I feel low
44.I can sometimes see things from others' point of view
45.I am good at reconciling differences with other people
46.I know what makes me happy
47.Others often do not know how I am feeling about things
48.My motivation has been the key to my success
49.Reasons for disagreements are always clear to me
50.I generally build solid relationships with those I work with
50 statements remaining